a welcomed sound

thank sweet Jesus for aiden right now.  after yesterday afternoon/evening...i needed her funny innocence this morning.

let it be said, that i don't have the slightest clue how to parent an older kid.  babies?  bring em on.  toddlers...pshhhhh...you don't scare me.  but...once they turn into big kids...the ones that back talk you and think you're an idiot and even hate you at times...

well...it's eating my lunch.

part of the problem is that he is his father's son.  he is stubborn.  he is prideful.  and he outlasts me.  mainly because i have the patience of a puppy.  plus...there have been times that he outwits me.  i'm not ashamed.  ok. so i sorta am.  turns out...i'm not ALWAYS smarter than a 5th grader.

yesterday was not good.  from the time he got in the car from school to the time we finally "found" him at 10:30 pm.  after finally getting him to talk...he had an extremely craaaaaaaaaaaaaapy day at school yesterday...which started the whole thing.  he faced things like being told that "he sucked" by people who's opinion matters to him...regardless of how many times we have told him it shouldn't.  he faced not making the mile relay team after he had been dreaming about it and practicing for a month.  these things would put me in a bad mood too.  the problem is...instead of answering my,

"what's wrong, baby?"

question...he sulks and pouts and punishes all of us...(the people who love him most in this world) with his angry attitude and disrespect.  and then it escalates from there...because you just can't let that stuff go.  and you can't force them to talk.  and if i had a dime for every time we have had the "just-because-you-had-a-bad-day-or-someone-was-mean-to-you-doesn't-give-you-the-right-to-take-it-out-on-us" speech...we would live on that ranch i've always wanted.

anyway...his attitude and tongue landed him in the backyard...pointlessly moving bricks from one side of the yard to the other while he "thought about" his disrespect.  that came back to bite me when he decided he just wasn't going to do it and there was nothing i could do about it.  chad is out of town...and mom has 3 other babies to take care of...so now is my chance to assert my stubborn will and independence and fly the coupe.  i watched him run down the driveway; turn the corner; and then didn't see him again until 10:30.

oh...there was stuff in between.  like casually looking for him at the park while pretending to be on a leisure, whistling walk...calling chad, who is 1,000 miles away, to ask what i should do...enlisting neighbors to keep an eye out for him...and praying that God would work on his stubborn pride and soften his heart towards his family.  the neighbors saw him a couple of times...and let me know he was safe.  and after calling UK for reinforcement...we decided it best to let him be and not traipse all over looking for him as he sits watching from a tree, satisfied that we are all pawns in his attention seeking game.  but those hours of waiting him out...especially after it got dark...turned my anger at his behavior into sadness that he is "that" unhappy.

after we patiently waited (not my strongest attribute) and some serious undercover stalking from UK (when my parents were divvying up patient genes...he got them all) we flushed him out.  i thought for sure that after having 6 hours to "think" he would come in all, "i'm so sorry mom and i love you so much."

not the case.

to make a long story not as long...i'll cut to the "we stayed up until midnight working it out" chase.  but this morning i woke up completely drained.

so, at breakfast...aiden started talking about their ages and the spacing between grades.  she said,

"so...i will be all alone at school when i'm in fourth grade.  colt will be gone.  chase will be gone.  and annslee will still be a baby."

we all listened to her rattle off the facts.

"and then...when i'm in 5th grade...annslee will be in kinder.  and then...after that...she will be all by her-self."

she thought for a split second and we all looked at her to see if she was going to add anything else.

and then she did.

"unless mom adopts a baby................

or lays an egg........"

i think i spit out my coffee.

and then i laughed.  for a long time.  and colton laughed too.

and that was a very welcomed sound.