Friday, April 15, 2011

"DENNIS QUAID IS HERE."

i can not even tell you how much better this idea sounded in my head. 

see...mrs. holloway is aiden's kindergarten teacher.  this is our 3rd time to have her...and coincidentally my 3rd time to serve as her room mom.  so you can understand our comfort level with each other by this point.  she'll text me and be all, "hey genius...you forgot to send snack, and it's your week."  and i'll walk it in, fresh from the store...with the baby on my hip and tell her to hang up her own damn, easter bunny bulletin board.  all in fun, of course.  she's like, the easiest teacher ever to work for.  plus...we became fast friends along the way. 

so...anyhow.  the kindergarten musical was today at 1:30 for the whole school, and then again tonight at 6:30.  last week, she called me to inform me that she was going to be out of town today for a family wedding, and wondered/begged if i could come up there and help the class get on and off the stage and handle any potty emergencies, fights that break out over who stands in front of whom, and any other common kindergarten musical catastrophes.  i said, "of course.  no problem."

she said that the music teacher, ms. poole wanted me to come up to the school the day before the musical (yesterday) in order to be at the dress rehearsal and learn what i'm supposed to do.  again...not a problem.  being as i don't know ms. poole from adam...i joked with mrs. holloway that i should come up there and act like i'm some crazy stage mom that is out of her freaking mind.  well...she thought this was a swell idea, and thus a plan was concocted.

when mrs. holloway introduced me to ms. poole before the rehearsal yesterday, i smiled and shook her hand.  she said, "thanks so much for helping."  to which i replied....

"sure.  now, i have a question about tomorrow.  is there any way that right at show time, you could introduce me and tell the audience that it is my debut directing job?" 

she said, "ummmm...wait...what?"

i said, "yeah...i'm super excited because it's my debut directors job.  you know...i've never directed a musical before.  i also have a director's chair that i would like to set up right in the front.  it has my name on it and everything."

silence.

"and i'm planning on wearing a dressy, black dress.  so i thought you could too...you know, so that we are dressed alike."

she chokes out, "seriously?  are you serious?"

"yeah...and also, i was thinking you could give my daughter a solo."

she was in the middle of trying to come up with a way to lose the crazy, freak show of a helper lady and i lost it laughing.  mrs. holloway had to leave the gym, she was laughing so hard.  and all the other kindergarten teachers were poking their heads in to see what she would do.  oh my word...it was ellen degeneres' "DENNIS QUAID IS HERE" at it's funniest. 

at least, i thought it was funny.  the jury is still out on ms. poole.  she kinda looks at me weird every time i see her now.

and then chad did me no favors tonight when he went up and introduced himself to her and said that he had noticed that my name wasn't in the program.

i must say...even if she thinks we are a bunch of loony tunes............totally worth it.  i haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

now.  what can i do tomorrow morning when i head up to chase's living history museum?  he's houdini.  there's got to be good material to work with here!!

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