Tuesday, May 31, 2011

6 years beautiful

when i look at her...i see beauty.  i see a kind of beauty that i never have had.  i see dark, silky hair and smooth, sun-kissed skin.  i see freckles...perfectly sprinkled across her nose and cheeks that suggest that the sun loves her and appreciates when she crinkles her nose at it.

i see grace.

i see a smile that has the ability to light up the world.

i see loyalty and love.

the 6th birthday hawaiian luau was shared with two of her fellow classmates and friends.  they all felt like hula princesses.  here they are playing the pineapple pass.  too bad you can't hear the beachy music in the background.

what would a luau be without coconuts?  here i am explaining the beach bag relay.  i think this was the favorite game...for the adults to watch and the kids to play as well.  the girls still giggle at the mention of the coconuts.

the kids had to put on everything in the beach bag...run to the beach chair...sit down...and then run back and take it all off for the next person.




water balloon toss


hula girl cake

hula princesses and their cake

baby hula princess

opening presents


when i look at her...i see beauty.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

just because.

i'm probably too old to wear my hair in braids.  even if it was just because i was headed to colt's baseball game and my hair was beyond any control, whatsoever.

but...that's how i feel about that.

and just because they are cute...here are two of aiden's besties.

the baby bird. just because she's getting so big!
and she loves hopping around our flower bed.

daddy snuggles. just because i can't really tell who appreciates them more.  her.  or him.

in appreciation of cute, summery pajamas and color coordinated pappys.  just because.....well....who doesn't appreciate that?

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

GRATITUDE (forgive me if i duplicate. some are just that good)

101.  popcorn

102.  little league

103.  goopy baby eyes

104.  dancing annslee

105.  freshly laundered blankets

106.  put your head on my shoulder (the song)

107.  sun kissed cheeks

108.  freshly bathed kids after a long, summer day of playing

109.  overtime

110.  slumber parties

111.  luaus

112.  a little girl in a flowy dress and a flower in her hair

113.  study groups

114.  a base hit

115.  visitors

116.  lemonade

117.  baby goats

118.  harry houdini

119.  chase's poetry

120.  wrapping up

121.  homemade fleece blankets

122.  porch swings

123.  fire pits

124.  the word "menagerie"

125.  mexican food and margaritas

126.  celebrations

127.  healthy food

128.  powdered donuts

129.  new york

130.  bright coral toe nail polish that makes your feet look tan

Thursday, May 19, 2011

fighting a monster

it's become more than a normal worry.  i had a feeling it would.  i can see an obsessive compulsion a mile away.  even if it is coming from a 5 year old.

it all began with a question that she asked chad. 

"are strangers real?"

he couldn't lie to her and tell her no.  so he answered like any other parent would.  and that's when it started.

i noticed that she was always checking to make sure the doors were locked.  i raised a red flag in my heart and began watching closely.  maybe...just maybe...it would not grab ahold of her and grip her like the ones that had made friends with me a long time ago.  before i knew what they were.

over the last several months, she has gone from checking every now and then to having a full-fledge compulsive behavior.  it's no longer enough to be told that the doors are locked.  she has to see it for herself.  she can be upstairs...playing on the opposite side of the house with a friend and hear the door close behind her brother...who is just headed out to shoot hoops.  i can't count to 5 before she comes flying down the stairs...runs past me...flips the lock...and shoots back upstairs to whatever it was she was doing.  i just stand there watching.  she's not scared.  she is just doing what she has been told.  by her own mind.

i keep gently reassuring her that she is secure.  that daddy and i are careful and that we are here to protect her.  and furthermore...that she has Jesus, who is watching over her too.  but she just nods, and says, "i know."  and she does know.  just like i knew that no matter how many times i switched the light on and off...it would not control whether or not i would get sick.  but i did it anyway.  and she checks the locks.  anyway.

last night, after everyone was in bed and asleep, chad went outside to get something out of the car.  as he approached the car, he heard the lock quickly flip.  he ran to the back door window in time to see her bolting up the stairs.  she had heard the door and didn't trust that we would lock it when we came back in.  this has gone too far.

i know what i have to do.  there is not a question in my mind.  i know what is making her have to do it.  and i also know how uncomfortable she is if she doesn't.

tonight, i sat down with her and i told her that i undersood.  i told her that it was going to be ok.  i told her that she didn't have to check the lock when her brain told her she had to...but that i undersood why she wanted to.  i also told her that it was a tricky thing sometimes...because afterall, sometimes you tell yourself that you are just being careful.  and smart.  like when i wash my hands all the time to protect myself from germs.  it's just smart.  even the media says so.  but deep inside...you know that it's not just you being smart.  it is something that has control of you.  it is something more.

i asked her if she would agree to come and tell me everytime she felt like she needed to check the doors.  i asked her to tell me before she did it, so that we could talk about it together.  she said that she would.

about 15 minutes later, chad and chase left for cubscouts.  i waited.  she came to me and asked, "can i check the door?"  i said, "i heard daddy lock it."  she said, "ok."  and then a minute later...she said, "can i check it just to make sure?"  it was not a surprise.  i know this monster well.  i am familiar with it.  and i refuse to let it take my daughter.  i said, "we are going to wait 10 minutes before we check it.  is that ok?"  she said, "yes."  i distracted her with dinner and conversation...hoping she could last the 10 minutes.  she did.  she lasted 15 before she asked if she could check it again.  i let her.  she did really good with her first go-round with cognitive behavioral therapy.  and fighting the monster.

i can honestly say that i am thankful for my battle with OCD.  see...i'm much more aware of the enemy and how to fight it.  i will continue to fight it for myself.  and i will stand in front of my daughter and fight it for her when she can't do it on her own.  and i will train her to fight for herself.
it won't win.

i can promise you that.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

sometimes busyness is really fun

wow!  it's been busy round these parts.

this last week has been completely nutso.  there's been lots of baseball, soccer, field trips, field days, birthday parties, baptism parties, movies, crawfish boils, and celebration/thank you lunches.  thankfully...my mother in law came to our rescue!!  she is here from iowa (and has been for the last week) so annslee has not missed as many naps as the above mentioned schedule would normally call for.

the sugar plum turned the big 6 on thursday.  she opted for a breakfast dinner to celebrate herself...and her love for waffles.  we did a joint luau for her and two of her friends from school.  it was friday night in the backyard and trust me when i say...that it was a procedure!!  trust me when i also say that the pictures (which i will post at some point) do not do the cuteness of these newly turned 6 year old hula princesses justice.

i got to run down a big hill with a bunch of fourth graders, climb a tree, look at dinosaur bones and real tiaras, go on a scavanger hunt in a texas exibit, take a picture of my arm pit with colton's teacher's camera, and throw an authentic hawaiian luau...(if you call silk flower leis authentic).  and that was all in one day.

it was a good week.

on a side note...i totally recommend the movie soul surfer to kick off your summer. i mean...it's not blue crush...but it's a good flick.

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Eight is Great.

Aiden Annee-Grace
Spring 2011
5 years
1st Soccer Season
aiden...soccer...the number 8...3 of my favorite things in one cute as a bug package.